Talk to Strangers

Second only to food, my favorite part of travel is meeting new people.

Whether it is a brief encounter, or the start of a life long friendship; the people are what make the trip.

One of the things that I hear a lot when people talk about venturing in to solo travel, and something I have felt a lot myself, is the fear of being lonely. Yes, there are lonely moments; of course, but that is completely normal! I had plenty of lonely moments when I was living in NYC surrounded by 8 million people and a gaggle of friends.

Something that I committed to when I started traveling more long term was meeting people and making friends. I am fiercely independent and enjoy time with myself, but I am also very social and need a community.

The community is still a work in progress, and is a bit of a challenge moving around so much, but the people and friends have been in abundance.

Much like with dating, travel has made me much more open minded with meet ups and putting myself out there with strangers. I have used Bumble BFF, local meet up groups, been active in on-line travel groups and put myself out there saying “Hi! I am in ___ too! We should get together!”, as well as finding a local café and bar to post up at frequently and be a short term ‘regular’, and that has lead to:

✨A fun night out dancing in the streets of Lisbon with a 23 year old daughter of missionaries currently living in Senegal

✨An ongoing friendship with an incredible British woman I met in a Portugal expat group who is starting a new chapter of her life as an expat in Lisbon as her daughters have grown and started lives of their own

✨A week long CDMX whirlwind friendship with a gay Mexican-American man on his own Tinderfella journey

✨Dates turned instant friends I have spent days exploring and touring with

✨An immediate and amazing connection with a now forever friend from Chicago that I connected with in a travel group and hung out with for several days in Lisbon

✨Brunch with a Canadian woman living in Germany, looking to relocate and find love in Portugal that I met through Bumble BFF

✨Meeting a German Mr. Olympia and Reality Tv star in Bucharest, Romania (but didn’t know they were famous until we shared IG handles when we parted ways)

✨An impromptu photoshoot on a bridge in Rome that lead to a walk and hour of laughter with two Italian women on holiday together

✨An hours long dinner and conversation with a travel group meet up in CDMX

✨A happy hour, then self-lead sangria tour throughout Lisbon with a FaceBook travel group connection and her adorable dog, that was the catalyst to meeting an international gay couple from the US/Italy that I spent several days hanging out with - leaving the gay bar at the end of their journey dubbed “Queen of the Bears”

✨Meeting up with a woman who currently lives in the Bronx for lunch and watching the procession of Corpus Christi in Lisbon with, then a great afternoon exploring LX Factory a couple of days later

✨Going to watch the Weddings of St. Anthony in Lisbon but arriving far too early, only to strike up a conversation with a couple from Chicago celebrating their wedding anniversary and a fellow solo female traveler from Toronto who also had the time wrong. After establishing we had a considerable amount of time to kill, we all headed to lunch together; returning 90 minutes later to watch the happy couples emerge from Sé de Lisboa.

✨Meeting back up with the traveler from Toronto that night to watch the The Marchas Populares then party the night away in the streets of Lisbon

I have run in to people that I have odd and unexpected home town and previous life connections with - like the older man who used to be a bouncer at a club I was crossing the Canadian border to go party at as a teenager that I met in a gay bar in Lisbon.

I have met people in other countries that I lived less than a mile from in NYC, including a Bumble date who literally lived 10 blocks from me in the Bronx for 2 years.

I struck up a conversation with two young American travelers in a park in Lisbon last week that lead to me buying their Weeknd concert tickets off of them (half price) and going to the concert the next night.

I have heard and shared intimate life stories and experiences with fellow travelers over dinners, brunches, and cocktails.

There is something about the freedom of travel, the perceived temporariness, and likelihood of never seeing someone again that lends itself to fast and free conversation with a stranger. I have discussed dating and relationships, break ups, and hopes for proposals with strangers-turned-friends in foreign lands. I have discussed family, friends back home, past adventures, struggles, and accomplishments with people I met just hours or moments before.

I have hosted, and been hosted, by international friends I met through friends and created a vast and wide network I never dreamed possible.

People I crossed momentary paths with have suggested the best bars, restaurants, sites, and events that I unlikely would have uncovered on my own.

I have shared meals and drinks and conversations with people I never would have sought out or connected with at ‘home’.

Some connections I thought would be lasting, ended as quickly as they started, and others that I never thought would last have held strong for years - but all have made a lasting impact on me and how I see the world, and myself.

All our lives, especially as girls and women, we are told not to talk to strangers, but I am here to make the rebuttal. Be bold. Be Brave.

Talk to strangers.

They may just lead to some of the most impactful people and moments in your life.